Cake Mix
by hanjuuluver
Summary: yaoi. Ed and Roy make a cake for Valentine’s Day. special editor rant at the end to amuse you. Hope you enjoy! and don't forget to leave a review.
1. Chapter 1

Someone once said that many of the best ideas are born from the realms of sleep deprivation and sleepovers…wait… no one said that? Well now someone has. So there. XP Anywho… that's how I got this idea. Tis a Valentine's Day fic, and if I can come up with something, there might be a White Day chapter too. Hope you enjoy reading this!

Rated K+ for kumquats (kisses).

Disclaimer: do you _think_ I own it?

Cake Mix

Why? Why did he have to be sick yesterday? And why did Roy have to stay home and take care of him? He was perfectly able to take care of himself! Ok, so maybe not. More like he couldn't even get out of bed because he was so dizzy and nauseous… but still! Why did it have to be the _one _day that the personnel working under one Roy Mustang had to decide who would bring what for the Valentine's Day party? He wouldn't have minded a day without food. At least then they could have been responsible for something easy, like plates or something. But _nooo_! They had to be responsible for the cake! Thus, Edward blamed his inexplicably bad kadarma (1) on his current position. Which just so happened to be standing in the middle of the giant, white tiled kitchen with a powder blue apron on. Sometimes he wondered what was wrong with his boyfriend. His only choices had been between a blue, purple, orange, or pink apron. Why the hell couldn't Roy buy a more manly apron? Ed had the growing suspicion that Roy just liked to see him suffer. This thought was replaced with a new one when Roy walked in wearing the orange frock and seemed perfectly okay with it. Now his only thought was, "my boyfriend is insane." Quickly followed by, "I hope it's not contagious."

"Well, I guess we should get started. Ed, could you get the cookbook out of the closet for me? The one over there," Roy said, gesturing to a small cabinet just above the sink.

Ed walked over to get the cookbook, which proved to be a much more difficult task than he previously would have thought, due to all the cluster in the closet. Why did Roy have cans of dog food anyway? Ed chose not to think about it, and just pulled out the hard-backed, red and white checkered cookbook marked "Desserts," withdrawing his hand and the book carefully so as not to knock out a can of dog food. Or whatever else might be in the cabinet.

"Congratulations. I was starting to wonder if you were tall enough to get it out," Roy mocked. Ed stuck out his tongue.

"I can think of better ways to use that," Roy stated off handily.

"Pervert," Ed scolded. Roy smiled and leaned over and kissed the small blond boy, who simply glared back, though there was no anger in it. "Come on, Roy. We need to get this done. Valentine's Day is tomorrow, and Riza will shoot us if we don't have the cake."

"I honestly don't know how Havoc has managed to live this long," Roy commented with awe. Havoc had been dating her for a little over a year now. As such, he was expected to be an example, and when he wasn't Riza was always there to "remind" him of proper etiquette.

"They really are a great couple though. You have to admit. I was starting to wonder if Havoc would ever get someone," Ed said, thinking aloud. "It also didn't help that you kept stealing all his girlfriends from him. The poor guy."

"Hey! What about me! It took me forever just to find someone I was actually interested it! Which, of course, was you," Roy said, throwing in some flattery before Ed could yell at him.

"Oh yes, poor you. It must have been hard to have so many women to choose from," Ed said rolling his eyes. "Here, catch," he finished, tossing a full bag of flour at Roy, who smartly decided to light it on fire, thinking a giant chicken was attacking him. Needless to say, that caused a mess. Roy partly re-opened one eye, trying valiantly to survey the outcome without getting the floating flower particles in his eyes.

"Smart move, oh Lord of the Flame. Your instant reflexes and wisdom on how to properly deal with a deadly bag of flour are renowned to all. Now help me clean this up. There should be another bag of flour somewhere," Ed said, now entirely covered in flour. They would need new aprons as well, and there was no way in hell he was going to end up in the pink frilly one. Ed grabbed the purple apron from the drawer before walking over to the pantry and pulling out a broom.

After three hours, the two finally managed to clean up the kitchen. Of course, they chose to ignore the fact that they were both now plastered with at least two inches of white powder, and the fact that there were about five piles of flour strategically moved off to the side so no one would step on them. Ed smiled and ruffled Roy's hair to once again glimpse a puff of flour fly from his hair, only to settle back down on his shoulders.

"Now you look even older, Mustang," he teased.

"Thanks, Ed. I appreciate it," Roy sardonically replied. "Go on, Ed, pick a cake."

"Okay…hmmm…" Ed said, flipping through the book. "How about this, 'Chocolate Mousse Layer Cake with Vanilla Bean Ice Cream (2).' It looks relatively simple."

"Looks good. And I think I have all the ingredients. Read them off the list and I'll go get them."

"Okay. For the cake: 8 eggs, 1 cup plus 2 tablespoons sugar, 1/3 cup unsweetened cocoa powder, 1 cup bleached flour, 1 teaspoon baking powder, 2 tablespoons butter. And then for the topping:1 pound confectioners' sugar, 1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa powder , 1 stick butter, at room temperature, 1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract, 1/3 cup boiling water, 2 cups heavy cream, 8 ounces semi-sweet chocolate, melted, 3/4 cup simple syrup, (equal amounts sugar and water, simmered until sugar dissolves), 3 ounces semi-sweet chocolate, shaved into curls, 10 to 12 scoops vanilla bean ice cream," Ed said, reading off the list and pausing between each ingredient, so Roy could find it and place it on the counter.

"Alright, what's next?" Roy asked. Ed eyed all the ingredients, noticing that they all had white handprints on them from Roy's still dirty hands.

"First, we should both wash our hands," noted Ed, walking over to the sink and reaching for the soap next to it. Roy came up behind him and reached over too.

"We can wash together (3)," he said with a smirk.

"Alright," Edward consented with a smile, leaning to the side a bit and making room for Roy's head to sit on his shoulder while they both rinsed their hands off, white flour running in fast streams down the drain. Roy pecked Ed's cheek before straightening up and walking over to get the towel, hands dripping the entire way. Ed rolled his eyes at the additional mess his boyfriend was making, but took the towel without compliment when it was tossed over to him.

"First we need to pre-heat the oven to 350. Could you do that? You're closer," Ed commented. Roy nodded and did what he was told, as Ed started to mix the eggs and sugar together.

The entire process was going rather well. Roy measuring the ingredients and handing them to Ed, who would in turn add them to the mixture and whisk them in. however, life is not perfect, and whenever batter of any kind is involved, you can always expect someone in the kitchen to start eating the batter whenever the other's back is turned.

"Roy, have you been eating the cake batter?" Ed inquired.

"No. why?" Roy asked, trying his best to seem innocent. But we all know Roy Mustang. He couldn't look innocent if his life depended on it.

"You have chocolate batter on your nose," Ed replied, wiping off the brown splotch off the other's face and sticking it in his own mouth. "I have to admit, it _does_ taste really good. But we have to save some for the cake."

"You're no fun," Roy said. Ed laughed and shook more flour out of his hair.

"We'll talk more about that once we've both had a shower," he said. He was starting to be glad to have this excuse to cook with Roy. Usually they took turns cooking dinner, and if they were both too tired they would just go out to eat. It was nice to cook with Roy for a change. Ed smiled and grabbed a cake pan from the cabinet next to the oven and started pouring the cake mix into it. "How long does it say to cook it for?"

"About half an hour. We can work on the topping while it cooks. This time you measure it out," Roy said, adding the last part as an afterthought. He hated measuring. It took too much time. Not to mention he could sneak more bites if he was the one mixing.

"Sure, but don't eat any of it!" Ed said, giving Roy a warning look. _'How the heck does he do that?' _Roy thought in wonder at his small blond prodigy of a boyfriend.

"Fine, you win. But you're still measuring."

"Whatever you say, Roy," said Ed, rolling his eyes and picking up a measuring cup.

The topping only took about fifteen minutes to make, which left the couple with ten minutes of nothing to do. This, coupled with the law of nature that states "mankind will be driven insane by the smell of baked goods," led to even Ed breaking down and agreeing that as soon as the cake was done the two of them were going to try it before bringing it to the party the next day. Of course this meant that Hawkeye was probably going to shoot them, they really didn't care at that point. Tis the curse of a well made cake.

But it was worth it.

The cake turned out perfectly, and actually looked like the picture, which, as anyone who has ever cooked knows, is a rare occasion indeed. It was a hit at the party too. Well, except for the part in which Hawkeye refused to let them have any because they had eaten some earlier. Which made Ed happy that he had thought enough in advance to have saved two more pieces for themselves in the refrigerator back at Roy's house. All in all, it was the best Valentine's Day Ed had ever had. Roy had given him a bouquet of red roses and a new alchemy book, and Roy himself had received a new pair of pyrotech gloves and a new coffee cup, as well as his favorite coffee. Ed found himself looking forward to next Valentine's Day, and making cake with Roy again.

(1): Kadarma stems from the words "Karma" (which hopefully you all know) and "Dharma" which means sacred duty, or fate in life. Hence, Kadarma means you deserve this as your fate in life, or in laymen's terms, sucks to be you. Only it's only one word, is more fun to say, and gets people to look at you funny when you say it. Karmacological is a description word for kadarma that may be used later. It means amazing. Hence, karmacological kadarma means "ha ha, you suck!" but karmacological by itself is a good thing.

(2): yes, this is a real cake, and yes it is a real recipe. Looket. See how much I put into this fic? http:// www (dot) foodnetwork (dot) com/ food/ recipes/recipe/0,,FOOD (underscore) 9936 (underscore) 6978,00 (dot) html?rsrcsearch

(3): my mind is being dirty, but it was only meant to be hands! This is a k+ fic!

Me: that was a lot harder than I thought it would be!! Gah! But yeay for yaoi fluff!! Let me know what you thought of it!

Notes from the Editor: First off, it's flour, not FLOWER, and Valentine's Day is always capitalized, AND has an apostrophe. However, those were the only glaring errors, so on to the commentary. First, I still say that lighting flour on fire would be a bad thing, as it would almost certainly explode. I wasn't kidding about that one! Second, my mind is as perverted as yours. Bad Maude, assuming Ed and Roy are saying kinky things to each other! Third, that cake recipe sounds really good, but it doesn't sound very easy. And I suppose you would know better than most how rarely baked goods turn out like the picture, huh? Finally, what do I have to do to prove to you that it should be spelled k'dharma? I stand my ground – apostrophes in the middle of words are exotic and sexy.

Another note from me: incase anyone was wondering, NinjaSquirls thinks apostrophies are sexy, yes, I do hang out with people like this, and no, I can't cook, as NinjaSquirls has already pointed out. –sigh—well, review!! review review review!


	2. NOTICE

I AM POSTING THIS NOTICE TO ALL MY STORIES BECAUSE IT IS IMPORTANT AND NO ONE SEEMS TO BE LOOKING AT MY PROFILE!!!

I have for some time been thinking about creating a new account, because I feel that I've outgrown "hanjuuluver" for a number of reasons--primarily that my writing style has changed so much it simply doesn't mesh with what I started with, but I don't really want to /erase/ my earlier fics either.

I would have moved to Live Journal, but I'm electronicaly challenged (a sad fate for a 20 year old college student at a tech school--It's most embarrassing) and can't figure out how to work it. As such, I am staying here on , but will be moving to a new account, **Rio Azules** is my new penname. As motivation to go over there, not only will I be posting my new fics there, but in a month or two that will be the only place to read the fanfics that I like from hanjuuluver such as Homecoming, Together in Solitude, For Now and Forever, and many more.

I really hope you all follow me over to my new account, **Rio Azules**, and that you continue to put up with my lameness. Chances are I will never write another chapter fic and will just be contented with occasionally posting one-shots, drabbles, and perhaps the occasional three-shot.

For those of you reading Waiting For You, I'll finish writing that here on hanjuuluver and it may or may not be transferred to Rio Azules later. We'll see.

Thank you all for reading my work as hanjuuluver.


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